Mary was miserable.

She moved to a new area and no longer had friends and family living nearby.  She wanted connections.  She wanted friendships.  She did not want to feel alone.  Since she always had had connections in her church, she decided to visit a church.

Upon arriving at the church she picked, Mary was greeted by a few people who told her that they were glad she was visiting.  She found a place to sit apart from others and watched as many of the people talked and hugged and shared what the previous week had held.  When the worship service ended, Mary made a quick exit and headed to her car.  She vowed that she would never go back to that church.

Read more: When We Need Others

Mary was not her real name, but her story is true.  Mary knew that she could find connections at a church, but she expected everyone cater to her – to make her feel like she had been there fore years instead of minutes.

What about you?

Churches are not perfect because churches are full of people like you and me, and none of us are perfect.  However, it is within a church that you can find your deepest relationships if you are willing to invest yourself (just as you would if you joined a new family).

When the church first began, you see a picture of how church still should be.  “They devoted themselves to the apostles’ teaching, to the fellowship, to the breaking of bread, and to prayer.  Everyone was filled with awe, and many wonders and signs were being performed through the apostles.  Now all the believers were together and held all things in common.” (Acts 2:42-44)  That is the kind of church to which we all want to belong.  Yet look at what drew them together.  They devoted themselves to knowing God’s Word.  They devoted themselves to building fellowship (connections).  They devoted themselves to sharing life.  They devoted themselves to prayer.  And everyone was there for each other.

It was never about what I can get out of this group.  It was always about what can I do to be part of this group.  Even though some people in churches may not seem welcoming, you can be.  And you can help transform that group into the kind of church we all want.

I hope Mary goes back and tries to join the fellowship.  I do not believe that most of the people do not want her in their group, but I know that we all sometimes need to be reminded that others want the kind of connections we enjoy.  Give it a try.

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